“For years I’ve had a wonderful circle of friends. We’re all from different backgrounds and have different ages and personalities, but we’ve supported and encouraged each other. I’ve been through many difficult situations, starting with my mother’s death, and most recently, a divorce. During those times, I relied on wine and my girlfriends (who all drink) to get through the stress and pain. But as time passed, and after some minor incidents, I realized I wanted to take a new approach.
When I talked with one of my best friends, Diane, about taking a break from drinking, she reacted in a way that made things even worse. It was like she didn’t want me to change, and not having her support made me doubt my ability to succeed. She brought up the topic within the group, and everybody was on her side. I felt that they didn’t approve of the new me, and that made me rethink my goal of maintaining my sobriety.
Now I know why Diane was not supporting me in my decision to become alcohol free: She was pulling me into the past to keep me in her life. She was afraid that I would drift away if I changed and stayed sober.
Her fear of losing me was guiding her actions, but how did her friendship become a selfish attachment? Only because I wanted to quit drinking and
make my life better.” —Silvia
Lamberghini-West, A., & Karlen Triplett, P. (2025). Tipsy: A Woman’s Self-Guided Method for Managing Alcohol. US: Aysen Wellness.